It takes a mature woman to understand the complexities of dating a man who has children because you may not always be able to do the things two mature adults would want to do together.If you come to care for the kids, however, the entire process can be rewarding and the relationship can go far.As I sat with my closest girlfriends on our routine girls’ night out (GNO) one Saturday evening, the suspense at the table didn’t go unnoticed.Prior to our meeting, I had mentioned that I had some news to share.It can be complicated when dating a man with kids, especially if he has all or part custody of the children.It can be hard to find time to be alone without the children and it can be challenging not to offer advice about childrearing to him.All it requires to successfully date a dad is to follow a few simple protocols and have a bit of patience.The same rules apply in reverse if you are a man keen on a woman who has children.
Some love to file court hearings at the drop of a hat and there is the potential for you, if you are living or ultimately married to him, to be pulled into these post-marital dramas. Many of you may have found out the hard way that your new love had lousy boundaries with his ex.
It was of no consequence whether we were tucking into eggs benedict at 11 or 11.30, but she interpreted my concern for my son as disregard for her.
I saw her irritability as evidence that she was a narcissistic psycho. You wouldn’t want to go out with a man who put you before the needs of his kids.
I have learnt through maturity and life’s little lessons, that limiting yourself or options because of the checklist of the perfect man or ideal relationship you have etched in your mind doesn’t actually prove to be realistic. Yes the other woman; the ex who will always be present in both of your lives. Will your plans get rescheduled at the last minute, because something came up with the child or because of a situation with the other parent? Can your significant other manage any possible drama? And let’s be real, what about feeling secure about your relationship when you see him with her and their child, looking like a happy family unit? Still, it was a great relief to have taken that step. another thing with dating someone who has a child is this…
But while it isn’t the ideal situation for some women, is dating a guy with a child really all that bad? It very well depends on the man, and how serious he is about getting into a committed relationship. When my guy mentioned that he had a child, I admit that the fear factor did set in. Having to deal with the ‘chile mudda’ may not be one’s cup of tea, but this is one of the things you may have to do while you’re dating your guy. something even more special is added to the relationship, as the guy would have to trust you to take such a big step in introducing you to his prized possession, and it’s often a good sign that he takes you seriously.
Here are some pieces of advice that will help you date a man with kids without having problems in the relationship.